A few years ago, I was looking for something.
I had no idea what that something was. I just knew I wanted to feel different. I had worked hard and acquired a lot of things I wanted. I noticed that my excitement became less and less when I got something new. The thrill of buying things I wanted wasn’t lasting nearly as long as it had before. I was dependent on things in my outer world to make me feel fulfilled and happy. When those things no longer did that for me, I felt lost. I couldn’t imagine what I was missing.
At that time in my life, I was busy. I made sure of it. I was busy doing. Busy doing everything that I thought I was supposed to do. I had my kids in every activity they wanted to be in. I had a business to run and was working full-time. I had all the duties at home of cooking, cleaning, yard work, and laundry. When I wasn’t busy doing these things I was busy thinking. I have a very busy mind. Anyone else? If things ever went too smoothly, I created all kinds of ‘what if’s’ in my mind to keep me from being at ease. I did my best to keep my life unsettled so I could stay busy ‘fixing’ myself and others, whether they asked me to or not.
I discovered that what I longed for was peace.
Finding peace became my new busy project. I was sure that the Universe would change every person and situation in my life. You know, change them so I could have peace. Needless to say, it didn’t quite work out that way.
What the Universe did do was bring to my attention, in such a way that I couldn’t ignore it, situations and people that caused me to feel anything but peaceful.
How was I supposed to be able to change all this? That task seemed too big. After struggling for a while I realized that I could change only myself. And the peace I was looking for could not be dependent on my outer world, it had to come from within.
For me, being in peace has become a daily practice.
I start my day with meditation and prayer. I love feeling peaceful. I have learned I can feel peace even when my life isn’t going the way I’d planned. What it really comes down to is that peace is a choice. Without a doubt, there will always be people and situations in our lives that give us the opportunity to choose peace. We get to practice being peaceful minute by minute.
When we change the world changes.
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