I wrote this affirmation for my inspirational card deck. It became my go-to mantra for solving issues that come up. When I need a solution to a problem, I look for love.
It’s easy to experience love in the situations that are peaceful and in alignment with what we want or believe. We look for these experiences because they feel good and seem to flow effortlessly.
Until the past few years, I had very little realization that I was in the habit of avoiding situations that I didn’t want to deal with. Ever find yourself there: putting off difficult conversations or dodging issues that needed to be resolved? By avoiding situations, I allowed them to became problems. The longer I went without addressing them, the bigger the problems became. In my avoidance, I felt tension, frustration, and resentment building. This led to heated confrontations and arguments. I would end up saying and doing things I was not proud of and would later regret. I would spiral into guilt, which caused me to doubt that I deserved to be seen or heard; so came the avoidance, and the cycle repeated.
Today I have awareness and know when I’m falling back into avoidance patterns. I have learned that confrontation can be love. That was a biggie for me because I always looked at confrontation as negative: something wrong or bad.
Where do we find love when the situation in front of us seems to be far from love?
I had an experience recently that Love brought beautiful solutions and healing. I needed to have a difficult conversation with people in my life that hadn’t been in communication for a long time. They had a painful history and both suffered deep wounds that came out in the form of lashing out at each other. On the drive to meet them I noticed the beautiful red, orange, and yellow leaves gleaming in the bright sunshine. I imagined the meeting unfolding with grace and ease and held the vision that everyone would feel loved and understood. I prayed that we could all put down past hurts and be transparent in our approach to finding solutions. When I arrived I reached into my card deck and drew a card. I love to draw cards for guidance. It said:
Love turns problems into Solutions
I was able to bring love to this situation. No judgments or expectations of the outcome; just a deep trust that acceptance of others, love, would bring solutions. Three hearts experienced healing that day, standing in the beautiful, bright sunshine, talking about uncomfortable things. No doubt there will be more obstacles in our lives. But we have a choice of how we show up and what we see in others.
When we look for love we will always find it. Just like when we look for disagreements or fear we will find that. This was a reminder for me to focus on Love because that’s what I want to experience and I can, even in difficult situations.
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When we change the world changes.