Changes

The past few weeks have been a bit challenging for me.

After forty-three years of working long days behind the chair doing hair, full time until the past couple of years, I have decided to work only one day a week.

I always thought I would do hair until my body gave out, my hands, wrists, shoulders, feet, legs, back, but they’re all in good shape.

I realized that I could choose to cut back before that happens.

I’ve always loved doing hair and couldn’t imagine doing anything else, until now.

I realized a few years ago that my real passion was the connection with my guests; our great conversations, getting to know them, hearing about their lives and offering my perspective if they were interested.

That connection makes it especially hard to tell some of my guests that I won’t be able to do their hair anymore.

I’m sure I mentioned it somewhere (a few hundred times probably) that I am a recovering people pleaser. The thought of disappointing someone can send my nervous system into a panic.

Imagine having to do this to a lot of people, one by one, while looking them in the eyes, full out feeling the disappointment that they can’t hide.

Of course, they were happy for me, but I’ve heard that it’s easier to find a doctor or a dentist when you move to a new place than it is to find a hair stylist that can do your hair like the stylist you’ve been with for years, so I get it.

You can’t imagine the number of times, okay, it was likely every time, that I would think, I can’t tell them, I will keep them on my books, I love seeing them. That little voice inside was relentless. Each time I would go through all the guilt of leaving them. Anyone else have this struggle?

This has been a lesson in choosing myself and putting my needs before others, even when it’s difficult. In my mind it would have been easier if I had physical reasons for cutting back. Choosing what I want when it’s going to disappoint others may always be tough for me, I care deeply about people.

The thing is, we have to care that deeply about ourselves.

We have to keep choosing ourselves, because when we continuously disappoint ourselves, we stop trusting the most important person in our lives.

I am forever grateful that everyone has been kind and supportive.

I am excited to have an extra day to write, take more mentoring clients, plan more events and retreats, and lots more.

Stay tuned, more coming soon!

When we change the world changes.